Have you ever felt you were wronged by someone? Have you been hurt? Have you held something against your brother? Do you have a broken relationship?
Let me encourage you to stop everything and go make things right. This is not an option but a command by Jesus himself. We shouldn’t be living in this type of pain and brokenness, especially with our brothers and sisters in Christ. Living in this state will eat at you, consuming you and make you ineffective in ministry.
Over a year ago, I had an incident with a friend/brother which nearly tore me apart to the core. When the incident happened, I was hurt and embarrassed and felt as though I was humiliated in front of a group of people.
There were several attempts at reconciliation by both parties; however, each attempt failed miserably and only turned our hearts further from each other. It wasn’t that neither of us wanted reconciliation; we both did. It was more of our failure to effectively communicate with each other after the incident. We both had unmet expectations from one another and we judged one another’s hearts and intentions.
Time went on and it began to eat away at me. I became angry. The more angry I became, the wound began to fester and affect me in everything I did. It not only put a wedge between me and this person, but with others too, as I began to lack trust in others. Most importantly, it put a wedge between me and my Lord. It wasn’t that my God ever turned his heart away from me, but I turned my heart away from him.
I began to lose confidence in myself, my effectiveness, my place, my worth and significance. I experienced anxiety whenever I would go lead a group of men in studying the Bible. I was afraid of another incident happening, yet this fear was absolutely ludicrous and shouldn’t have been a worry at all. I began to lose my desire to study and worship. I began to lose my desire to even get up in the morning. Eventually, this anger led me to sin against my friend and mentor.
This friend, who had every right to be angry with me and write me off, instead was Jesus to me. He asked me to meet him with two important scriptures in mind – Matthew 5:23-24 and Matthew 18:15. When we met, he first made things right with me. Then we began to discuss the incident that had gone on for way too long. He did something very important, he called me out and told me that I not only judged his heart wrongly, but also my brother who I was angry at. This was hard to hear at first, but it was truth and I needed to hear it.
Was this brother at fault for all of the pain and hurt I experienced? Absolutely not. Only I was to blame. I thought our failed attempts at reconciliation stemmed from him hating me and not respecting me. I had no clue that it was eating at him and his heart’s desire was to restore our relationship. We both failed in that regard.
Once I heard this and his desire for restoration, I realized my sin. I took it to the Lord and he transformed me immediately. He made what was broken, new and right. I then immediately sought out my brother to make things right. I can gladly say that our relationship is now restored. I now can freely worship again.
If you have any kind of brokenness in a relationship, I implore you to stop and do whatever you can right now and make things right. Don’t let things to continue in this broken state any longer. Don’t think it’s too little or too insignificant. Don’t think it’s too late or too far gone. If you see a brother who has become embittered with another, call them out. Only Jesus has the power to transform hearts and fix what’s broken. You have the power to stop, listen and act.
“”You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’ But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire. So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.”
Matthew 5:21-24 ESV
“”If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.”
Matthew 18:15 ESV
Posted on October 14, 2018, in Christianity, Life, Religion, Spirituality and tagged anger, forgiveness, God, Jesus, Matthew 18:15, Matthew 5:21-26, ministry, reconciliation, sin. Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.